Will it always be this way.....

Yeah I am lost.Lost in the banal pursuits. Slogging hard to live up to the hypocritical expectations.Sometimes i push myself so far that i fear i might topple over...Its only the addictions which has kept me sane.But, for how long????...
The memories come floating in front of my eyes....Cranium stopped, peception lost.....Ah!! the bliss.
Pschycedelic visions of days gone by......I keep hallucinating all the time.I try to seek,but.......